Escapism and the Fruit Stand

Not quite as catchy a title as “Sex and the City,” but descriptive nonetheless. 

This week I found myself back at work. No, not at the Peace Corps. As hard as I’ve been trying to use Jedi mind tricks, the Medical Portal server will not allow us to log in until the government shutdown is over. No, it’s not the State Department. I’ve given up submitting endless applications with all the appropriate “choose the most complete answer for your experience” bubbles filled in. And even if I did get an interview, it’s far too close to my departure date to matter. The security clearance alone would take up the last remaining months of my time here. Is it... the corporate retail giant affectionately known by employees as the Fruit Stand? Yes. I’ve returned, tail between my legs, to scarf up the next few weeks of retail employment before I have to pack up and go. It may seem irresponsible to accept a position this late in the game when I might leave the country in 3 months. I struggled with this decision, but I decided to accept. I mean, when I first got my nomination way back in March, I was slated to depart in October. Which is this month. For all I know, it could be NEXT October before I actually leave. Isn't that how it usually works? As any smart person will tell you, “always have a backup plan.” I don't know exactly when I'm going to leave. It could be next month, or next year. And why not do something fun until I go?

At this point in the process, I technically only have an invitation to serve in the Peace Corps. Pessimistically (or realistically), it’s by no means a “done deal.” I haven’t even finished submitting the extensive medical paperwork, and this is the part of the process where they weed out a huge chunk of applicants. Or so I’ve been told. If I’ve learned one thing so far from the application process, it’s that nothing is certain. What if I don’t depart in January? What if the government shutdown delays the staging events, and pushes back the departure dates? What if the shutdown has furloughed enough domestic employees that the Peace Corps can’t send another group abroad in the next few months? What if (for some unknown reason) they deny my medical clearance? What if Morocco experiences a social or natural disaster, and they cancel my invitation? What if part of the bipartisan deal to cut funding to “non-essential” programs trickles down to the Peace Corps? These questions have been careening around in my head for the past few months, and contribute heavily to my occasional panicked ravings. I’ve made light of my fears and reservations in the last two posts, but I assure you they are very real. 

I’ve had multiple versions of this conversation - 

“Why apply for a job when you’re just going to leave?”

“Because I’ve been unemployed for 8 months, and I miss working there.”

“Did you tell them you’re going to move to Morocco?” 

“No, because what if I don’t. It’s not relevant until I get a final offer, after all the clearances are processed and approved. And that won’t be until the end of November, at the earliest.” 

Long story short - Whether I’ve admitted it or not, I’ve spent the past few months planning my life around the fact that I won’t be living here next year, with no thought to the possibility that I might have to stay. I hope with every fibre of my being that I will be able to depart to Morocco without delay, but it’s eased my worry to know that if I don’t go, I’ll have a good and stable job that I enjoy. Either way, I’ll look back on this post in four or six months and know that I had my bases covered.